paid hard

paid hard

for the simplest things

you know

everything costs the poor more

in hard earned cold coins

scraping the edges of my tired hands

in the giving over

for each minor mistake

I felt the lash on my bent back

pushing me along

go further along steel tracks

find something there

you can’t be here amongst us

try over again make like new

no accidents here

no missspokes misunderstands

no walking it back

responsibility is only

really there for the low

& I hear them uptown singing now

justice does not apply to me

& I’m wondering why my back teeth ache

this hot anger ebbs & flows

while downtown

only the gospel choir really knows

what does she know?

I’d lie in my bath

just enough bubbles

to stop my little yellow duckie

in his tracks flow

thinking on the day to come

those gone by

& she

in her wisdom told me

in a bath you are soaking

in all your yesterdays

where a shower takes everything

away

so I switched for a while

getting the flow not too cold

heat goldilocks about right

& no thoughts came

understandings of yesterday

& my little yellow duckie

got lonely stuck on the side

until the one thought

came clear

in terms of process

soaking in thoughts feelings

understanding the shitshow

what does she know?

dust from distant places

back a couple of days

& looking around

the piles of stuff

needs washing

putting away

hanging on the wall

the knick knacks souvenirs

picture postcards on the fridge

creating tracks across the floor

the sand from far off places

leading to & from the door

leaving reminders

once we weren’t here at all

& the stuff that doesn’t show

is the dust from distant places

settling slow in my mind