but hope

I walked everywhere then

in that easy gift of youth

good feet strong legs

the courage to wander

with nothing in my pockets

but hope

a smile on my face

a willing for something good to happen

creating its own confidence

to strut the streets

able to deal with whatever occurred

there in the day

where now

we must plan have destinations

contingencies resources

which only limit the possibilities

who?

had I become

shrouded in memories

haunted by the you’s

of sordid histories

chances taken

squandered

openings disregarded

wilfully missed

to sit here alone

in an old coat

pockets with holes

bare table but for a bottle

sipping on something

to make that last

knowing nothing

ever does

but the eternal of

why?

what?

when?

joined now by

whatever

the issue of money

having lived long years with little

or no money at all

my attitude is easy

on this money thing

I tend not to splash out when flush

& when I’m dry I survive

the problem with this easy way

is people

they misrecognise the attitude

thinking because you seem easy

there must be some cash to spare

which they would like to have

but begging gets in the way of pride

so scheming they devise devious ways & means

to lever the dosh from your pockets to theirs

my self-made millionaire friend T tells me

this happens all the time they need seed cash

will happily pay him back at ten per cent plus

but when he asks to see the books the plan

they feel no need hoping there was a better understand

& if all this can be accomplished without emotion

some sordid sense of strange feelings they seem to say

we’d all be better off in the world

we can all be easy about money

if you’d just give yours over

place it right there in my hand

to break a man further

days between the sheets

plotting my return to the world

lost in what had happened so far

& hoping the future

would not turn out the same

& he comes to my door wanting change

I ain’t got nothing but some ideas for you I venture

as his mouth turns down at the tips

look all I want is enough for a drink

ok ok I say but first lets help you think

I put some work your way

just how did that go?

weeeell it kinda didn’t

y’know I made the first day

then she got sick & the dog

crapped on the carpet

the car wouldn’t start

& well, y’know how it goes…

I turn out my pockets wide

got some fine blue lint here

few crumbs from an old cigar I found

you hurting too? he ventures

eyes scoping the room

see what might be around

yeah, I might be, I say

just not maybe in the way you are

mine is a different down

& he leaves muttering to himself

how he might be broke

but there is just no need

to break a man further to the ground