or something

or something

someone

or something

has changed

when

what we had

was I thought

something good

but all of that

has got up

& gone

When someone

or something

changed

drinking my wine

she’s drinking my wine

sitting in my chair

Christ on a bike! I think

is this bitch goading me?

she’s already dropped the line

once a teacher always a teacher

with a leery lopsided grin

sucking on my good wine

fat ass sprawled in my favourite chair

telling me how she could be a therapist

no training no philosophy ethics sense

ranting on life issues

like she has lived a thousand lives

not the quiet one she leads

watching tv the soaps quiz shows

snapping answers to feel clever superior

now she thinks the poetry is easy

all ya gotta do she says loud

is put rhymes end of lines

make it sound da da da da Da!

I feel violence in the air

throbbing purple between my ears

checking my watch thinking

I can last for another half hour of this

then she’ll leave go home to silence

meantime I check out the kitchen

the bathroom bedrooms hallways

yep all still there as her voice drones on

tongue thickened by my good wine

& insensitivity

how to say

I think

maybe know now

I offended them

riding through the city

with getting cut off

almost rammed

cars changing lanes

no indication

wannabe racers

challenging at the lights

& all I want to do

is get home to her

end of a working day

but no

they’ve seen the biker flicks

think I’m the evil do’er

makes me public enemy number 1

so when they come up behind

start beeping the horn

I give them the finger

not knowing then

these were people I knew

trying to say hello

how to say now

just

you wouldn’t understand

first ansaphone

my first ansaphone

hard brown plastic

with a micro cassette

recording my message

with music in the background

to be somehow clever

sophisticated even

looking forward

each night to the red flashing light

just to delete delete delete

from an irate husband

leave my wife alone

angry girlfriend

I know you’re there hiding

riding some slut

the bank

we’d like you to come in please

to discuss your recent transactions

to wonder over & over

why did I buy this piece of crap

just to torture myself?

I know nothing

that I know nothing

has at times

been made abundantly clear

despite all of that

I have been known

to take to my feet

deliver life lessons

soliloquies

on the meaning of life

how to live right

& just so we’re clear

more importantly

how very much

not to live your life

all your admission costs are

bring them in

& keep pouring

that way

we are sure to remain friends

finding meaning together

so like a fool

turn right here she goes

no no I protest its further down

turn right she says again

with such surety I turn right

and

we’re lost

again

I have to turn around go back

back to where we started

drive further down

oh why do you listen to me?

she asks all broken up to be wrong

you have this certainty I say

your way is the only way to be

I had to fight my sister every day

she says now all mournful

who would fight black was white

the sky was grey & she was loved more

so like a fool

I listened & forgot to not listen

to her instructions

until the next time

just me

just

my friends pen paper

slowly dissolving through the days

nights

writing trying attempting

to say what I was thinking

feeling even

lost on the street

wanting to reach out

feel something other another

excuse me can I touch you for a while?

knowing how that would be

exclaimed as a pervert

some street molester

to protest no not in that way

just you

just me

in a hug a soft embrace of hold

the cops

you wanted to be held?

try these bracelets

& we’ll hold you for a while downtown

so I didn’t

just me

my friends pen paper

dissolving through the days

nights