Ghost of my mother

wakes me about three
keeps me in that twilight zone
of not awake not asleep
until she quits around five
she wishes to apologise
make everything a ok
I think what this really about
is she doesn’t like what I write
about her
the way she was
so I tell her it’s a bit late
for all of that
when you were here
you would not let me in
should I be the same to you now?
& my dad is there somewhere too
I hear him chuckling
he knows he did his best
has no apologies to make
except that of not loving enough
& that is a sin
I believe we all create
while I try to tell her
like your life
your will
its too late to fix
I’m not in it

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