kiddingnapped

A summer Sunday
easy drinks and lunch
with a newer
better
until
you knocked at my door
‘we have to talk’
me on the dog shit pavement
no shoes
‘nothing left to say’
sat in your car
smoke, lipstick, ash reek
for privacy you want
& you drive away
careering
canyon empty streets
as I fear
your sanity
my life
where this will go
and you drive
saying nothing
not a word
from those clenched
white, thin lips
until you finally
drop me
with a snarl fuck you
a hundred yards
from my door
later you tell people
he has communication
control issues
yep, you got that one spot on

ode to wander

the curse
& the joy
of the nomad
I can talk of cities
streets
welcoming cafes
off’f strange alleys
where I may never go again
to roam
is to have to continually
re find
source new
or to bring everything
with
when I return
I see the changes
altered shapes
that remain the same
if different
which you forget to notice
over time
as you stay still
much like us
I have wandered
and you are the same
but for
subtle shifts in emphasis
I have left
& you are waiting for me
to leave again
& I will always
want you
to be the same.

slow tonight

At the window
traffic slow tonight
supposing
just supposing
I wanted to reach out
tell somebody
something
to try
& touch
someone
let go of the pain
& instead
recognising
their
hurt inside
that stops me
dead
in my tracks
its not any competition
but a hand
curled in rage
cant reach out to mine
my truth
slips out sideways
cos that’s just how
this all works
in the kingdom of rain
words are
misheard
misunderstood
interpreted
wrong
I sit at the window
looking
for a friend
complete
without pain
its going to be
a very long night.

dancing bear

People kill
quickly, quietly
a soft word to the ear
I used to dance for myself
feeling it
feeling rhythm
beats
bass, drums
all of IT
y’know
just wigging out
digging music for me
and she said
wow,
you dance real wild
& that fucked me
I hadn’t recognised
that you have to dance
for others
for them
to watch, see
observe
interpretive dance?
Fuck you.

leave like the drop of a hat

We were easy
any night any
pub
party
friend group
work mates
nightclub
the street
shops
any time
anywhere
we were easy
to pick up
to form relationships
to live with
maybe get married
but once the babies came
a better provider came
the strain of fulltime us,
came
we were not easy
to
control
live with long term
we had wrong friends
bad habits
farted
drank
snored
drugged
would argue back
but like a weed
that flower in the wrong place
that you attack
over & over
we were easy
too
to get rid off